Going home for the holidays can be so exciting especially when you haven’t seen your family and friends in months! You get excited for the family traditions, catching up with old friends, and the joy of being home. Yet, there is always someone that has to make a comment about your body appearance or weight. Who’s been there?
I also work with college athletes- in their time at school they go through training sessions gearing up for their sport season. Their bodies change depending on which season they’re in: off- season, pre-season, in-season, post-season, injury. Of course, they might look different when they go home. No different than a student who goes away to college and comes back home after an extended period of time. Everyone adapts to their environment which may include a change in their outward appearance.
I’ve heard and experienced the “long time, no see but have you lost/gained weight” comments. When people make me feel awkward, I laugh. In my head, I probably think something else but outwardly I laugh it off, literally. There are times I take it personal so I can only image how someone that may be struggling with how training effects their bodies or living in a silent fear of food, in which there’s an internal fight in regards to their relationship with food.
Going home and being surrounded by loved ones is not the time to hear comments about your body. These comments could be well-intended; however, their meanings having lasting effects on someone. An athlete or not, you know what your body looks like. You live in it. If you want to have these conversations, you’d initiate them with those you feel comfortable with. I want every one to feel confident in their bodies no matter the size or shape; however, I also know you can’t control what others say, when they are going to say it, or even how they say it but you can control how you react to the comments.
Here are 5 ways to “laugh off the comments”:
- Change the subject- you don’t even have to answer the question, you can just change the subject.
- Thank you for noticing a change; however, I didn’t come home to discuss my body weight or size.
- I know you don’t mean to hurt my feelings with the comment you made on my body; however, please know that comments on people’s bodies can lead them down a road of unhealthy relationships with food and exercise.
- With social media and diet culture defining how people should look, its already hard enough to accept my body shape and size, additional comments from those I love do not help me feel confident, please do not comment on my body.
- I am happy and healthy, insert smile.
Reminder: body shape and size doesn’t define health. If you struggle with body shape and size, please reach out to someone you trust or find professional support. Every body should be able to enjoy going home without fearing comments on how they look. They should feel confident going home to people they love.